My entry for the humourous dialogue writing competition organised by economics club, IMI Delhi which won the second prize

Why a macroeconomics professor should not be made the faculty placement coordinator:

A week after summer placements started at Management Institute of India (MII) – Akbarabad, the student placement coordinator meets the faculty placement coordinator.

Faculty Placement Coordinator : Hello Arpit, so how did the summer placements go? Have you been able to satisfy the needs and wants of everyone?

Student Placement Coordinator : Not bad sir. We have a lot of new recruiters this year offering better roles and significantly better stipends.

Faculty Placement Coordinator : That’s nice to hear. What’s the real rate of increase of stipends over last year i.e. after adjusting for inflation?

Student Placement Coordinator : Sir, we don’t calculate such figures. We have put up a better show than last year but still we are struggling because of the sudden batch size increase.

Faculty Placement Coordinator : Well, you shouldn’t be worrying about all these micro issues. India is an economic powerhouse. This is where the growth is. The quarter-on-quarter GDP figures for the second quarter of FY 10-11 are extremely encouraging especially in the manufacturing sector. The September IIP numbers are also very positive. Now the only worry is inflation but part of this high inflation can be attributed to base effect. Also I feel there is an urgent need to change the composition of the basket of goods used to calculate inflation. Moreover WPI is very misleading. We should only look at CPI and in that case inflation would be even higher.

Student Placement Coordinator : Sir, what can be done about our problem?

Faculty Placement Coordinator : See, RBI must step in now. There is just too much liquidity in the system. CRR must go up by at least 75 basis points.

Student Placement Coordinator : Sir, I am not talking about the inflation problem. We are worried that we might not be able to achieve 100% placements this year.

Faculty Placement Coordinator : You shouldn’t be aiming at 100% employment. You should only try to achieve natural rate of unemployment.

Student Placement Coordinator : Sir, but other b-schools in the same league are boasting of 100% placements.

Faculty Placement Coordinator : Well, in that case, ask the people who are not placed to sign out of the placement process. Then they will no longer be a part of the labour force as they are not actively seeking employment. So you can achieve 100% employment without placing everyone.
(Student Placement Coordinator faints)