Thousands of supporters of a certain politician who once served as
chief minister of a prominent northern state took to the streets to
celebrate the historic DNA test result that was made public last Friday.
“We are so happy. Our leader has become a father at the age of 86
years. It’s a rare and incredible feat,” said a supporter wiping his
tears of joy. “This flies in the face of all the naysayers who grossly
underestimated what our leader was capable of despite having seen what
happened in the Raj Bhavan of a southern state when he occupied it.
Satyamev Jayate!” said another.
Confusion prevailed for some time on Friday as Youth Congress workers from Tamil Nadu (where names and surnames of Northerners are easily misunderstood) who had earlier burnt copies of a newspaper to protest against the TIME cover story about Mr Manmohan Singh came to Delhi to congratulate Congress spokesperson Mr Manish Tewari on his being declared a father. For once, the usually garrulous spokesman was dumbfounded and had a tough time convincing the mob that it was not he who had become a father.
Jest Kidding spoke to someone close to the senior politician. This is what he had to say: “Our leader is scared of needles and that’s the only reason behind his dodging and delaying the process of giving a blood sample. There was no other reason. The entire world knows that.” When asked what was going through the leader’s mind on the day the DNA test result was to be announced, an insider whispered: “On Friday, our leader was feeling exactly like a school kid on the day of the result. He knew well that he had messed up badly but was still hoping for some miracle.”
A senior official in the law ministry confirmed to Jest Kidding that there was a proposal to set up a fast track court to hear all the paternity suits against the leader. He also said that the process of filing claims against the leader would be simplified. Soon, plaintiffs would be able to file a paternity suit against the leader at any post office and at all branches of nationalised banks in the country.
Textile major Raymond announced a new line of semi-formal suits named after the leader. A company spokesperson said: “This is targeted at all those who are fathers. We are planning to brand it as RaymoND paternity suit as a mark of respect to the leader. The leader himself will endorse the suit.”
Some overenthusiastic supporters of the politician have proposed that he now be recognised as the real ‘father of the nation’ but the government dismissed these demands as frivolous, mischievous and irresponsible.
Link: http://thestatesman.net/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=418592&catid=39
Confusion prevailed for some time on Friday as Youth Congress workers from Tamil Nadu (where names and surnames of Northerners are easily misunderstood) who had earlier burnt copies of a newspaper to protest against the TIME cover story about Mr Manmohan Singh came to Delhi to congratulate Congress spokesperson Mr Manish Tewari on his being declared a father. For once, the usually garrulous spokesman was dumbfounded and had a tough time convincing the mob that it was not he who had become a father.
Jest Kidding spoke to someone close to the senior politician. This is what he had to say: “Our leader is scared of needles and that’s the only reason behind his dodging and delaying the process of giving a blood sample. There was no other reason. The entire world knows that.” When asked what was going through the leader’s mind on the day the DNA test result was to be announced, an insider whispered: “On Friday, our leader was feeling exactly like a school kid on the day of the result. He knew well that he had messed up badly but was still hoping for some miracle.”
A senior official in the law ministry confirmed to Jest Kidding that there was a proposal to set up a fast track court to hear all the paternity suits against the leader. He also said that the process of filing claims against the leader would be simplified. Soon, plaintiffs would be able to file a paternity suit against the leader at any post office and at all branches of nationalised banks in the country.
Textile major Raymond announced a new line of semi-formal suits named after the leader. A company spokesperson said: “This is targeted at all those who are fathers. We are planning to brand it as RaymoND paternity suit as a mark of respect to the leader. The leader himself will endorse the suit.”
Some overenthusiastic supporters of the politician have proposed that he now be recognised as the real ‘father of the nation’ but the government dismissed these demands as frivolous, mischievous and irresponsible.
Link: http://thestatesman.net/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=418592&catid=39
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